Joe Morgan: The Best (Worst?) of 2009 Thus Far

Here’s the best of the previous three Joe Morgan chats. Archived here. 

More craziness and nonsense ensues. Enjoy.

June 30, 2009

Brian (Hudson, FL): Joe, Have you gotten a chance to watch Gordon Beckham? In the past 12 games he’s hitting .300. What type of player do you see him turning into?

Joe Morgan: I have not had a chance to see him play. I’ve read that he’s got all the ability. He was a high draft choice, so they thought a lot about him. The good thing is I haven’t heard Ozzie criticize him. If he wasn’t playing well, Ozzie would have already criticized him.

This is ridiculous. Joe is supposed to be the #1 Baseball Commentator in America, and he hasn’t seen Gordon Beckham, one of baseball’s top prospects, play. But nicely done with the Ozzie Guillen jab. Sincerely.

Tanner Athens TN [via mobile]: Who is the biggest name to move before the trading deadline?

If he names one single name, I’ll give you a million dollars. Shake on it?

Joe Morgan: I think we’ll see an active trading deadline. You have to remember that all the teams think they’re still in it. So until we get to the end of July, we won’t know who thinks they’re in or out of it. But if it stays like it is, those teams won’t want to make trades. Right now, the Dodgers have a real sizable lead but the Giants have a shot at the wild card. Until some of these teams start to fall off, I don’t think you’ll see many trades before the deadline.

Nope. No name. Instead: We’ll see an active trading deadline, but remember all the teams are in it, so we won’t know until the end of July who’s in it or out, but if it stays like it is those teams won’t make a trade, the Dodgers have a big lead, but the Giants might make the Wild Card, so until some teams fall off we won’t see many trades.

This is just pure nonsense. Why not just pick someone. Maybe Matt Holiday. That’s a safe choice. You’re job is to use your “expert baseball knowledge” to give more insight, not circle around the question in a dizzying whirl of vagueness.

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Joe Morgan: During our Sunday Night telecast, I through out a theory on why players got hurt more than before even though they worked harder to stay in shape. In track you’re taught that once you reach your peak, you can only stay there for long before you go down. With these guys staying in shape year round, maybe they’re working too hard. There has to be something going on with the injuries. Think about it and let’s talk about it next week on our chat.

That’s right, more players are getting hurt because they’re in better shape.

 [Slamming head on desk]

June 23, 2009

John (CA): What are your thoughts oin Tommy Hanson so far?

Joe Morgan: I haven’t seen him, and I havent read a lot about him, but everything I hear about him on TV, he’s going to be a star. But I don’t use other peoples’ judgements on players, I like to see them. I don’t follow the lead of others in terms of rating players. I like to do it myself.

I like how Joe gets all confrontational here. C’mon, Joe, dude did ask you for your thoughts, not other people’s. Stop getting all hissy. And again, why haven’t you seen him or read about him? He’s the biggest prospect in baseball this year outside of Matt Wieters.

Ben (Lincoln, NE): Joe, what’s your take on the White Sox?

Joe Morgan: That’s a team that I just can’t figure out. Every time I think they’re going to go down and they should start rebuilding, they win a few games ago. Contreras came back and looks great. They look good for a moment and then they fall back. So, I can’t figure them out. They have some young players and veteran players, but I just can’t figure them out. They could turn things around and win the division or they can fall deeper toward the bottom of the division.

This is a classic Joe answer. It’s like he’s terrified that if he gives a straight answer, Ozzie Guillen’s going to come to his house and punch him in the face. How does he get away with an answer like this: “I can’t figure them out. They lose and then they win. They look good and then bad. So, I can’t figure them out. They have some solid players, but I can’t figure them out. They could win the division or lose the division.” Thanks for the insight, Joe.

Ryan (VA): Hey Joe is Chipper Jones a 1st ballot Hall of Famer if he doesnt reach the 500 homerun mark?

Joe Morgan: Being honest with you…that’s a great question. I don’t normally answer those questions because I’m on the Board and I don’t want it to look like I’m pushing for a player while he’s still playing. however, I think that Chipper will end up in the Hall of Fame.

I like how Joe “honestly” thinks it’s a good question, and decides to point that out, intimating that the other times he says “good question,” he’s just lying. Plus, he always pulls this shit about being on the Hall of Fame board, so he can’t really comment (but then he ALWAYS does). I think it’s just a way for him to tell people that he’s on the board.

Justin (Ohio): Hi Joe, was curious about your thoughts of Dusty Baker’s job with the Reds this year. Seems like he is holding this thing together with duct tape at this point.

Joe Morgan: Obviously he’s done a fabulous job considering the position they’re in. They’ve lost Votto for a while. He’s done a great job with the young guys, Jay Bruce, Phillips. He’s done a great job with the bullpen, pitching staff. But he’s one of the best managers in the game, I wouldn’t expect anything less. That’s why I’m not surprised when Bobby Cox, Tony LaRussa, Joe Torre lead their teams to doing well.

First of all, managers don’t have that much of an affect on the game. They basically manage personalities. Not Dusty, though. His tendency to overthink every situation often kills his team. He is not a class with Cox, LaRussa, or Torre. They have 7 World Series rings between them, and he has none.

June 16, 2009

Joe Morgan: Kudos to Cliff Lee to coming close to pitching our first Sunday Night first no-hitter. Pujols got his 1,600th hit. Kudos to those guys.

Could you pick two more arbitrary or meaningless stats? 1600 hits? When did that become a milestone? Why not celebrate his 1627th hit? And hey, Cliff Lee, way to come close to pitching a no hitter. And it wasn’t even a one-hitter. He gave up three hits. Ugh.

Michael B (Owensboro, KY): Good Morning Mr. Morgan! Simple question…. what is wrong with my Atlanta Braves??

Good Morning Mr. B! You may think that’s a simple question, but this is Joe Morgan you’re asking.

Joe Morgan: Well, the Braves do not have a consistent offense, first of all. Any time Chipper has some inconsistent days, its’ even weaker. One of the biggest problems has been Jeff Francoeur, he has not been consistent the last couple of years. They need him if they’re going to make any sort of run. As the team is constructed now, I don’t think they could beat the Phillies or the Mets.

What is an inconsistent day? Is that just a bad day? Or is that like a 2-4 day? Is the inconsistency confined within the day itself, or is it part of a larger string of days? I think Morgan equates consistent with good and inconsistency with bad, in part because he refuses to say that any baseball player is bad at baseball. To wit: “Jeff Francoeur, he has not been consistent the last couple of years.” That means he’s bad. And Joe, if you think the Braves are relying on Francoeur so much that he is an integral part of their success, then I think you have your answer right there. “If the Braves can stop depending on Francoeur for offense, then they will be OK.” The guy’s just not good. He has an OPS+ of 89, with 100 being the number of an average MLB player. No…it’s not good to be under 100.

Z Man (Chicago): Joe, do you expect the Reds to play more consistent once Joey Votto returns and brings his steady and consistent offense to the team?

Joe Morgan: The thing that’s really hurt the Reds the last few weeks has been Votto’s absence. He was the stabilizing factor on that ballclub. Had he not got hurt, the Reds might be in first place. But the offense has sputtered because he’s been in and out of the lineup. He’s definitely a difference maker in that lineup.

Joe Morgan thinks that a guy who spent a month on the disabled list this year because of anxiety and depression is a stabilizing force. He didn’t get hurt, Joe, he kind of went nuts.

Cosmo (Anytown, USA): Are the Phillies your pick to represent the NL in the World Series again this year? Why or why not?

Joe Morgan: Yes. There’s something about the Phillies. My great friend who passed, Harry Kalas, called them the Fightin’ Phils. That was an affectionate name for them. They have a good makeup on that club. Charlie Manuel has a good feel for his team. I know the Dodgers have had a great start, but I still think the Phillies are the team to beat.

Joe says the Phillies are his favorite to win the NL. That’s all well and good. Why’s that, Joe? “There’s something about them. They have that affectionate nickname the Fightin’ Phils. They’ve got a good make-up and a good feel.” Thanks for nothing man.

dan (Hopatcong NJ): Who do you think the Mets will acquire before the deadline?

Joe Morgan: The Mets are in the same position as a lot of other teams. THey’re without Delgado. Beltran, Reyes have been injured at times. They’re in the same position and need to get their guys healthy. But I definitely think they need to get another bat. I’m a big John Maine fan, but he’s injured right now. People coming back from injuries will be key for those teams that have guys on the DL.

If we worked together and you asked me where the copy machine was and I answered:

“Well, you’re in the same position as a lot of people who work here. We’re without carbon copy paper, and doing a transcription or a rubbing will take too long. You’re in the same position as a lot of guys here. But I definitely think you need to find the copier. You know, I’m a big fan of that lamp in my office, but it’s broken now. Fixing that lamp will help the lamp work.”

You’d probably hit me, right? Or try to get me fired.